I just got done with a local artist meeting.. 

it took all day. 

I was blown away.. like that dog on new years. 
that scar on my arm to remind me.

climbed a 15 foot steel pole in the middle of a huge green field, yellow flowers,
green grass and rows of dirt arc away from me in an impossible perspective as i tilt my head,
the perfect architecture of beauty twisting below my shadow.

i chased a startled rabbit into the field.. the past will catch me as i run faster.
stopping.. tired i look down to the dirt and see a skull of a small animal. died. alone in this vastness.
i take the skull in my hand.

i had everyone at the meet talk about themselves a bit.. went well. people starting to communicate.
afterwards i ended up staying with a part of the group at in and out burger for dinner. fun talks..

i saw the broken glass on the concrete of the overpass while walking home. 
it was dark and cold and the lights from the cars reflected on the glass..
like a field of a million stars as i walked across them
my hand still red from our parting high five, the skull still clutched tightly in it.

i think im losing faith, my whole life feels like some kind of big movie.. 
one that ends really violently and awful, and i cant change the script.

Its.. i guess its just that when i break down into tears on some cold winter night,
in some state, under some bridge, like that small animal that died in the field,
id like there to be one person out there somewhere in the whole world, that knows why.

these strange dreams ive been having lately, i cant explain them

-L0cke                                    March 27 / 2000