Spent an evening with friends watching some animation/ kicking eachothers ass via Soul Calibur.
Kinda funny how 10 minutes of stuff in real life, is the psychological equivalent of 10 hours online.

Remembering back when i was little.. i never really had a plan for life. I just knew i wanted to draw.
In school i worked hard to develop my drawing and studied art with all my heart and passion..
Art history, movies, books..  everything i could do to immerse myself in my chosen profession.
I sometimes wonder what kind of life i would lead if i had chosen something other than comics.
I had job offers in Architecture.. a few connections in Fine Art galleries.. quite a different road from 
comic art on either end. 

Architecture would have offered a secure job. Financial stability, challenging work, respectability in
society, ect. I had always been interested in buildings and houses.. designing spaces for habitation,
an integral service to society.. functional art. I COULD HELP PEOPLE. This was always a big part of the 
pull to this job for me.. that i could somehow improve society. Leave a permanent mark by designing
a structure.. that people would live in.. work in.. share time with thier friends.. meet the girl they love..
A eternal gesture of ones belief to the progression of mankind. Art as more than entertainment.

Fine Arts. The true starving artist. A painter. Romanticized in our time to say the least, Names like
Van Gogh, Picasso, ect. are common to be heard in any discussion of art. It is the aspiration of every
young artist to achieve such expression.. such recognition. Tho most young artists do not know that 
Van Gogh never sold a painting in his whole life and died unrecognized and poor, This part of the story 
is generally learned around highschool/college, when friends, family, and teachers are convincing  said
artist to get a real job :3 Fine arts would have prolly led me to a life as an artbum on the streets of new york
or a wild success, being sought after by the retarded and no less pretentious patrons, who pay millions
for abstract work, rendered at the level of a 12 year old student or a similarly aged monkey.

Then theres comics.
Of course its nowhere near as glamorous as an Architect or Painter in U.S. society, a childrens entertainment
medium. But the comics i read were not born of this mindset. I read comics from around the world..
Mobius, Shirow, Otomo.. dark, adult themes, heavy graphic detail.. a far stretch from 90% of the shite
America was producing at the time. As i delved further into the international comic market, i became more 
intrigued with this form of storytelling, and how it could combine all my interests of writing, research,
painting, and architecture, combining into one glorious effort to which i could surely find my lifes calling.

so here i am years later.. 21 books under my belt. pretty much no reputation, 53 cents in my wallet, and a
fire in my heart to tell stories through comics. It has been a long and educational journey. I have seen
cheats, liars, laughing, dreams.. and crushed dreams.. i have watched universes created and discarded in
the same night. I have watched friends turn against eachother like wild animals, girls reduce themselves to
groupies.. All for the glory of this little 32 page booklet called a comic. 
Im happy with my decision though. Its hard to explain how i feel when i sit down to draw everyday..
Like a child playing.. like a dreamer dreaming.. its the greatest feeling in the world, the freedom i find in
a blank page before me as it becomes a picture.. leaking my ideas into the world. A storyteller. A designer.
A painter. A architect. A NINJA.

mom... dad...  wherever you are.. i want you to know  I AM A COMIC ARTIST. AND IM PROUD OF IT :3

 -L0cke                                                                                 April 4 / 2000